Forgiveness

My horoscope for today said this:

"...Forgive those who have hurt you and forget the pain you endured, because the negative is pain, but the positive is that it made you stronger."

Last night I had a conversation with a dear friend about how I react when  people cross/hurt/betray me, I established that the technique I deal with such hurt is revenge. I never seek the payback or look to hurt them on purpose, it, at all times seems to fall right on my lap and I have been guilty of taking advantage of the situation to make them feel the pain that they made me feel. In my mind I’m teaching them a lesson but looking back at my “eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth” behavior, I hope I went about my damage differently.

I strongly believe that it is better to let karma do it’s job and just walk away, yes as the victim, with my head held up high and no dirt on my hands.

I’m not perfect. Experiences are what shape me and you, good ones and bad ones, more bad ones than good because the bad ones are the ones that make us stronger.

XoXo

A new me

Girl Friends For Life

I have never been the type to BFF girls, not by choice but just the way I grew up. I was raised by a lot of my uncles, and played with my boy cousins, unfortunately that wasn't by choice either, the girl cousins would NEVER let me play with them to the point where I would actually cry and beg them to at least let me sit and watch them play lol. I grew accustomed to the boys that I actually adapted thinking and sadly even behaving like one sometimes, don't get me wrong I still had my female traits because my mama forced me to act like a lady at home.


I noticed as I was growing up that I have developed a pattern where I would be friends with females, a little bit down the road we would just fall out, no explanations, no confrontations and to be honest with you...I could care less, I'm sure if you ask for their side of the story I of course would be at fault, again...I could care less.

As time went by I grew up to man up to my mistakes, apologize when I'm wrong and fight for friendships that mean a lot to me. Look at it this way, if the flow changes between me and you and I don't reach out to know what is going on that would be because I could give 2 shits bitch :) it’s been a pleasure; you can proceed with your "life".

This is no way shape or form low blows to any females I was cool with and are no longer cool with, this just came from the actuality that I’m growing closer and closer to a girl friend of mine. We fight like relatives, she keeps it 200 with me, I’m there for her, and she’s there for me. When I'm in the wrong I’m the first to apologize (few days later give or take lol) and if she's in the wrong, it's the same thing.

I recently said to her that I hate fighting with her and she went on to explain that real friends fight, they make up and become closer, fake friends … don't do that.

Thank you for being you,
xo NEB xo