Head Over Heels

I’m Marcus McFly. The bald kid from the “you know”.

I don’t claim to be some expert on sex. Hell, I just lost my virginity my damn self. Lie. I just think, from a philosophical standpoint, its about establishing some form of reciprocity when it comes to doing the ‘grown up’. And in my opinion, that’s what the bulk of relationships – be they one night stands or happily ever afters – center around. Reciprocation and balances.

Oh, I’m talking about felatio, cunninglus, going down. Eating pussy.

I was talking to Zineb (Nebby of The Segment) a couple of weeks ago regarding the topics I would cover when submitting to her blog. This was one topic we joked about discussing, and I sort of drug my feet approaching it. Until, one of her readers accepted my challenge of emailing me any questions or thoughts regarding my weekly posts.

A shorty blasted my Blackberry with the question: “...my boyfriend doesn’t give me any foreplay or oral sex which is a problem because I haven’t had an orgasm in months… …what do you suggest I do to convince him to give me head?”. She went on to write a few other choice things. Something along the lines of “…are all guys afraid to go down or is it just him?...” . Quite honestly my vanity interpreted most of her email as an invitation to give her the relief she needs- but thats just me being vain again.

My only recommendation for shorty is, if hes not doing it for you then leave his remedial ass. Homeboy is giving a heavy amount of us brothers a bad name. I cant speak on behalf of any one man, but I can speak for myself when I say shorty aint afraid to kiss it. And there are a lot of dudes who aren’t.

So leave his ass and find a boy that will.

Call me a hater and a snake in the grass for making such a suggestion. I don’t even know homie, and I’m sure a lot of dude readers are probably just like him, afraid of it - its just that when it comes to relationships of physical intimacy [fucking]; if theres no reciprocity, theres no balance. And without balance, you are fucked from the start. Another classic principle. Efforts have to be matched, and people have to be satisfied.

I do a lot of shit talking with my homegirls and my homeboys respectively. Its often we talk about sex and relationships and the bulk of our conversations actually center around this concept of reciprocity. I note that there are more of my homegirls willing to go down than my homeboys – and it is what it is, its not going to slow down my progress – but damn, are we still afraid to go below the belt?

I know a lot of my girl friends already have their bases covered. Early on, they subscribed to the concept that what one person wont, another one will. Or more specifically; what one man fails to deliver, another will willingly provide- without thought or desire of expectation that his efforts will be reciprocated. There is always a relief pitcher.

So to the shorty who hit me on the Blackberry with her question, step out for the sex you deserve. Go for it. Your boyfriend sounds like the type of dude who would rather be cheated on than satisfy his girl. Find yourself a lifestyle blogger from Kentucky with a tongue that won't quit; and go for yours.

I joke, but seriously; its no revolutionary idea, not an avant garde bedroom tactic- but for whatever reason, it is a substantially overlooked part of the sexual practice that most of my homies fail to observe. Don’t be a pussy when it comes to the pussy. If shes sucking your dick, homie lick the strip. Or be prepared to bow out gracefully, because at the end of the day she is going to get what she wants.

Its like the homie Pharrell said, “…I support the pussy if its brown or if its pink and aint afraid to eat it- but never if it stinks…”


PS: I do other shit here, follow the homie's Twitter.

Hey Marcus,
It's me Neb. I just wanted to say AMAZING post oh and amazing HS yearbook pic! lmao xoxooxox


Marcus McFly said...

Let me be the first to comment this jawn by saying, Zineb I am going to kick your ass for posting that picture of me. That is all. Love you bye. Asshole.

TheDeF said...

first things first....will you marry me marcus? lol

Based on personal experience it seems like men of most other races are more likely to "bathe the kitty" than black men.

monica said...


Anonymous said...

Black guys dont eat pussy. Only american blk guys. Tell her to get her ass to the USA. If he doesnt want to do then he doeant have to. The girl sld jst go fond someone else that will.

PRIS said...


hustleGRL said...

Hi Marcus.... you need a clone that you can ship to me in Toronto. Or, you can move here.


Tia said...

SeX is over rated. Not every guy has to yam pum pum. If he doesnt want to do it then he wont. Theres nothing wrong with that. If thats all she cares about is her pum pum not gettjng yammed he sld leave her ass then. If the man is satisfying her in every other way. Then she sld be happy.

Mike said...

Marcus.. So say ur about to go down and eat it. You find that it aint smellin that well down there wiuld u continue to eat it out or u find a way to skip the yamming process.?

Nebby said...

all this pussy "yamming' (that means eating marcus) talk is making me feel weird.

k let me put in my two cent. the last two folks that spoke on the pussy yammin/smell i will bet are from OH CANADA. it's like i swear you guys have been BRAINWASHED to think that a guy eatin a girls pussy is GROSS/DISGUSTING and just WRONG, even the girls hear it so much that it's like winnin the lucky 7 for them when a guy automatically does it, some of em have even been lead to believe that it is wrong.
I dont think marcus is sayin leave the guy if he wont let her sit on his face but let's "face it" oral is foreplay, foreplay comes before havin sex. Its like washing your hands before you eat you just do it. you kiss you make out if it leads to head gettin then it leads to that if it doesnt then it doesn't no big fukin deal. OH and obviously if it don't smell right the guy will NOT be lickin nothin, i would hope not to say the least.

I had the pleasure of living in both Boston and Toronto. to make the long story short in boston guys would brag to me about the things they could do to me with their tongue down there as i walked out a club. In toronto...not so much.

Elva said...

First off, I love this blog lol you guys really just cover EVERYTHING. & Marcus, i completely agree with everything you said. Most guys won't go down unless a girl does. I've had ex's that have said he doesn't eat, I say hey I'm not going down unless you will.

Fucked up? Yeah. but that's why they're my ex's >=]

And I've found that black men are the first to go down. God didn't give them those lips to just walk around and mean mug all the time lol I love black men.

Anyway, yeah I think reciprocity and the intensity of the relationship is what usually calls the shots. After you're with someone for a while you become comfortable with them in every which wayy.

Loved the post btw. Insightful hearing it straight from a dude who seems to know what he's talking about lol

Marcus McFly said...

@Tia Thanks for your comment beloved. I would have to disagree in that "sex is overrated". I would argue that sex is necessary. For fact of pleasure, gratification, procreation, and the like. The write up encompassed sexual reciprocity. The imbalance when a woman goes down on a man and a mans refusal to return the favor. Not focusing entirely on men who just plain wont yam vajay. If anything, I was focusing on alleviating all forms of imbalance in physical intimacy by completely taking care of one another during foreplay.

@Mike Fortunately I havent encountered that very often. Then again I'm a lightweight alcoholic and most of my sexual encounters are while greatly inebriated. If you are down there homie and need to bow out, bow out gracefully and unabruptly. Leave the premises as slowly and graceful as you came.

@Zineb I co-sign. Foreplay is a very integral part of the 'grown up'. On the one hand, it makes the entire act of doing the business more enjoyable. And on the other hand, if you can get her climbing up the walls before penetration... shiiit its in the bag during 'the big show'. Trust. Also, I had no clue dudes in Toronto werent the type to yam the pum (did I say that right?). Is this the part where you tell your readers, the homies and I are flying into Toronto for New Years?

Anonymiss said...

Every guy has a type of girl he'll do it for.

I never had this issue, they all did it. Most of them said it was their first time lol, but I somehow dont think so.

Black men eat pussy yo, they really really do. All men will eat it if it's presented to them the right way. Hygiene is important, grooming and all that.

Besides, as kim says; N*ggaz ain't stickin' unless they eat the kitten... I'm just saying lol.

jade said...

in all honesty, i've never been in a situation where the guy won't lick the kitty. i completely agree with marcus, sex is necessary and about balance because if you both aren't gettin' your rocks off and bringin' one another to that place where the toes curl and the eyes roll back then you're just gettin' fucked. and that's not fun. well, at least when you're not in a committed relationship. i have no problem using my oral fixation to it's full use at the drop of a hat but there will be issues if the oral love is not reciprocated. and on the race issue, i feel it shouldn't be an issue at all. it has nothing to do with the males race and more to do with him. granted, every man i've been with has been of the negroid persuasion, but i've got a multicultural track record. and if they are american, jamaican, trini or african it all depends on their own personal preferences and also their comfort with you as a woman.

but that's just my two cents.

oh yeah and marcus - lemme get them digits lol ;D

Breezi F. said...

Interesting post McFly. Its good to see that a man knows what it takes to please a girl cause it's plenty a dudes who are fraid when it comes to head! If a dude acts like a botch, (yes, botch) during fourplay, he best not think of everrrr gettin any from me. ever. lol

PS-What part of Kentucky are you from? I graduated HS from there lol

manny said...

Am I the only 1 who has a track record of men who luv 2 eat pussy?......prob not but all 3 of my exes and my current man luv em some seafood.lol. It's mos def not necessary erday or if its a quicky but if ur gon b tearin it up u betta b luvin it down 1st that's jus how it goes. Plus it really inspires me 2 give great oral in return( not that it always has 2 b tick for tat sometimes im good wit jus getting). Ive found there's somethin really excitin about using my mouth 2 satisfy my man and im sure he feels the same. So 2 all those out there who look at oral jobs as being just that jobs u are really missin out in another form of intimacy which brings u closer 2 ur boo, and leaves u both satisfied and always fiendin 4 mo.

Moon Air ( Get it? lol) said...

How to get your guy to eat the fur burger for the first time.

1. First off, you need to make sure he really likes you. Sounds funny but there are a lot of "Jump offs" running around thinking they are wify.

2. Next WASH YOUR ASS!!! I don't mean like showering everyday, do that too but wash your lil scooter before you attempt to get face off'ed. There is nothing that will turn a virgin mouth off more then the slightest hint of Legal's when he goes down... Wait i think Legal's is only in Boston... well if you don't know what that is think Red Lobster + about $20... Basically make it smell nice. I'm not saying this only for chicks with stank puss. Vagina has a smell and the best smelling box is the box that smells like nothing at all. A good time to try would probably be in the shower.

3. Shave, wax, put a landing strip, and some glitter on it if you want, i don't know, just make it look presentable. The idea is if it looks nice and smells nice when he gets face to face with it he wont think it is so bad.

4. You have to be giving him "mad fallaci." If your not going down, then its never ganna happen captain. The better you are at it the higher your chances are.

5. The last step is kind of like a two step process that you need to do at the same time. First turn him on, like really turn him on. You know that teasing shit yall be doing when you give us head but dont want us to cum, so yall kinda BS it. When you get em nice and ready try to move into a position where he becomes face to face with your fresh, Brazilian waxed Big Mac. Maybe lay em down and try to slide into a 69 position or something. Once in position, if he doesn't go for it put it on his face. If that doesn't work then fuck it, get another man. Nine times out of ten, if it doesn't work he will be so pissed off that you just sat on his face you'll probably have to get a new man anyways lol.

But based on a number of conversations I have had with girls and my boys about this topic, this should work. Usually the smell and the hair are the two biggest things that turn dudes off from doing it. Eliminate those and add some super hornyness and you should be good to go.. or should I say cum lol

Anonymous said...

now were talking about eating ass. SO to lick the pum pum i have to lick the ass as well ?

♥j.coco said...

i've never had a problem getting a guy to go down on me...ever!! and yeah like moon air said, it does help if it's presentable...less(hair)is more!! and one trick i've always done is, kept always feminine wipes in my purse or bathroom so when it's about to go down i go to the bathroom right quick and wipe that bad boy down!! lol.

Moon Air ( Get it? lol) said...

LOL J.COCO that's called "considerate coochy"

Anonymous said...

My man loves eating pussy. Even when I just wanna fuck he still insists to giver her a kiss. It's wonderful. As for all you talking about the smells, I feel like a pussy can be put into two, maybe three categories.

There's smelly pussies, the ones that smell like fish and whatnot which probably means you need to get checked out before your letting anyone put their face in there.

There are pussies that smell like a pussy and if you can't imagine what that would smell like its the same smell of sex, that sweet musky smell. It's my natural scent and smelling it on my man's lips after he's done licking drives me wild.

Then there are pussies that simply smell like nothing, nothing at all.

Anonymous said...