Good Girls Never Give It Up

I’m Marcus McFly; a visitor around these parts.

I was literally just having this discussion with my homegirl the other night after a poetry slam. The argument was whether or not giving it up during the honeymoon phases of a relationship is a good or bad idea. By the end of the conversation, she agreed to disagree. I don’t think we are friends anymore.

Her question was why she has the worst luck with dudes- after giving up the Foxy Brown. Silly question to have asked me, I never even knew shorty got down like that to begin with. The concept of her busting down was disgusting- but there’s a bigger picture. All’s the same I suppose no matter who we are; hell the principles even go both ways.

I didn’t even know where to begin on shorty. It only started to make sense after she disclosed she was prematurely giving up the kitten after only knowing the dude(s) for a couple of days. I could’ve slapped the shit out of her; because, the principles have been the same since middle school.

Good guys never give it up, and good girls shouldn’t give it up- on the first night.

From the moment I first started busting down, I liked the excitement of a challenge. It’s a primitive innate part of being a man. We decline having an affinity for games; when in reality we’re genetically pre-disposed to being fans of it. Ok maybe not all men. But certainly is the case with me. If we are both fans of having one another in the picture for a while, let me put in the capital and work for the goods. Putting the pussy on a platter and leaving it at my doorstep is foolish.

I mean of course I’ll take it. It’s primal. If you’re offering, I’m accepting. But you have a responsibility to yourself to know that giving too much too soon increases the chances that when you next reach out to me, I’m declining the calls. Hell half of the time when we do it, it’s not even deliberate. We just generally lose interest in anything you have to say or offer.

I am a man. I engage in sport, challenge, hunt, fish, fight and pursue. If a bottle of moscato and BlackSummersNight gets the panties to fall, we lose the desire to continue pursuit- and there goes the guarantee of sustainability. We’re out the door faster than we came. Came. Think about it, what would be the purpose of hunting for food if it was surrendering itself on your dining room table? Shits pointless.

That’s not to say we want a chick who is toying with the pussy either. If I’m 3 dates in and spreading my rent thin so I can impress your ass, you better be preparing yourself to knock it down- or be stuck asking why you [still] can’t keep a man.

It’s all cyclical I suppose, and on a one-to-one basis. But in regard to the bulk of we ‘regular motherfuckers’, giving it up too soon leaves you alone too soon- but waiting too long and that shit will spoil. And no man likes having to wait a year and a day for the kitten, and finally catching it only to discover it smells like the inside of Pacquiao’s gloves after a boxing exhibition.

*Kanye Shrug*

PS - I do other shit here.


KidCampbell said...

"if a bottle of moscato and BlackSummersNight gets the panties to fall, we lose the desire to continue pursuit" -- lol this was funny as hell, and so, so, so true

Leese said...

I somewhat agree but im gonna have to say ... we are adults here. I have been in a situation where i had sex on the first encounter it's not something i do all the time but it has happened once before. I dont believe there is anything wrong with that if the vibe is right and the chemistry is there then hey. But then I guess thats where the line is crossed and they are labeled as a one nighter ... this is a tough one but great post!

Keira said...

so, you are sexy. It would be hard to not want to jump your bones on the first date. lol

that's all

Nebby said...

I see you ladies like my friend Marcus ;) don't be fooled by his cute looks, he's an artist. You know what i mean, hes very smart, genius like, and he will never call u again if u let him pet the kitty on the first date LOL.

Ok so my take on this: I agree with all points. Yes we are adults, if the chem. is there and everythin feels right and it just happens that fukin happens then HEY it happens. BUT you have to be able to deal with the consequences such as...will he think im a hoe?! will he call me? do i think hes wack ? do i think he does this all the time? save urself the trouble by savin the kitty petin for when u get to know the guy a lil more, cuz honestly sometimes the more u get to know them the less u wanna give up the goods.

Anonymous said...

great post!

Karlareyes_ said...

im sneakin of to read this post cause i am at work..

But anyways. Wow great point of view from a guy. See i always thought guys didnt care cauae all they wanted was the vjay jay.. My guy friend always says " if i were a girl i would be a slut" im like wtf !! Givin it up right away looses self repect for urself and how the guy thinks of u as well. Think about ur morals first then anyone elses.
I knw some girls gv it up soo fast and wonder why the guy isnt around anymore .. Duhhh cause he already got what he wanted.

Like nebby said "sometimes the more u get to know them the less u wanna give up the goods." &

MarcusMcFly u made a very good point. A+ on this post. A good men with good words.


TheDeF said...

It's really about knowing which guy to do what with. Quite frankly women set themselves up for failure often by assuming that sex is the way to keep a guy interested, as well as assuming that all men are the same. I agree with Marcus, guys are very intrigued by the chase. I find they are equally as intrigued by innocence [even though they don't often admit it].

be. • thelegendsleague • said...

this isn't the reason why i love your blog.
but it is a new reason to continue to love it.

dope post.

Anonymous said...

if women stopped being stupid whores then men wouldn't have to act like fucking douchebags. "female chauvinist pigs" is a fantastic piece of literature.

Anonymous said...

Its a shame that females still fail to realize all of this. This story has been told too many times.
Ladies should not expect to meet their husband after they get it in on the first date,second or third. But on the other note, women must realize this; If the dude doesn't feel like waiting for you, he really isn't interested in you to begin with,so don't feel bad, more fish in the sea.
I learned this a long time ago: Never love a man more than they love you. Sounds like "she man woman power," but it makes sense.

TAS said...

You kind of threw me off with the "Good guys never give it up" line. If the box is good,then there is no reason for not going in on it.

Ladies, if a man takes you out on a date, sooner or later he wants to fuck you. People need to get over the 20th century bullshit of holding out for months before letting a brother in. Why? If you think he will leave once he gets it, then you are only prolonging the inevitable. Now, i don't recommend fucking before you get to know your partner, at least exchange last names.lolll.. All jokes aside, if we can get to the box easily then it's kind of a letdown. I mean, don't get us wrong, we will hit that shit all night but it sort of loses it's value. Personally, i like a challenge and getting that shit way too early is like preparing for a huge exam only to find out it's an open book. But don't be going and putting that shit on a fucking pedestal. We will start to lose interest and it ain't pretty when we start to think with our dicks.

I don't think it's a bad thing to have sex early on in a relationship. Just make sure when you decide to do it, you are doing it for yourself and not because he will leave if you don't. *On the side note, Ladies, please don't sit there like a piece of meat and make us do all the work. This shit right here is a two way street & if the sex is bomb, we will be happier than an artist getting his release papers from Bad Boy ENT.

To be honest, sex is overrated. Overrated in the sense that people overvalue it. But yeah, there are no set of rules of when it's appropriate to have sex during a relation but if you are getting along and it feels right go for it. Just remember to wrap it up

I probably contradicted myself somewhere but fuck it it's late. Cool blog.

Cass said...

Def a GOOD read!

Natalie said...

Great post and sadly what I thought was common sense..

Anonymous said...

TAS - Fully contradicted himself. saying that its the 20th century so waiting for months shouldnt be an issue - Tell that to your daughter when you have!
Then you go off saying that you like a challenge and you should wait. I guess your the type to be just happy to just get it. So be honest and say that you have no problem with girls hitting it because hey it would be less of a challenge for you.
Sex is overrated and that not everyone should be out there buttnaked with everyone. OR you think someon is fine and you get buck with them right away. SEx changes everything in a relationship.

Jolie said...

This was such a great read and although I agree with Marcus, I couldn't agree more when Neb said the more u get to know them the less you want to give up the goods. I think anyone who's old enough to read this post without blushing profusely like a juvenile getting a wedgie, should already know this though. At this point,women should have already realized that all men are hunters. Yes, it's true we live in such a modern society, where women can hit on men. But if you look at the majority of those cases, the one where women approach men first, they never last. Why? Because there was no effort put in. Kinda like when we know a dude already likes us, we don't feel the need to go as extra hard. Why shoot a bird when there's an eagle laying next to your foot?

Intimacy is the price men pay for sex. Sex is the price women pay for intimacy.


Ms. MusiQ said...

LMAO @ "And no man likes having to wait a year and a day for the kitten, and finally catching it only to discover it smells like the inside of Pacquiao’s gloves after a boxing exhibition."

WOW! I have to agree though... If there's no challenge, why would you "claim" it?

♥j.coco said...

i'm lovin' it marcus. preach!!

Janine said...

This was a great read and I love Marcus' perspective and his writing style. Having said that, I will say that this topic ticks me off just a little bit. Why does the responsibility fall to women to be the circumspect, moralistic ones? It takes two to have intercourse, does it not? Maybe the problem is that we are all prescribing to the belief that it's in a man's nature to be rougish so we should allow them that. We as women should be virtuous "good" girls and say no to sex no matter how much pressure is being applied by their partners, no matter how much she might WANT to have sex. Why should we be the only ones to bear that responsibility? Why NOT make men exercise some self control? Why shouldn't we ask men to operate with the same 'morals' that we are expected to. I'm not advocating sleeping with every man who makes the kitty purr...far from it. There's more to relationships than sex and I believe that it's important to get to know a person before you offer them something as personal as your body. The onus to do so should fall on both sexes. Anything else, in my opinion(and I cannot stress that enough) are vestiges of our puritanical past that should go the way of the 8 track tape.